How does a 2 year old make someone feel like they cant draw near?

Lastnight, my soon to be ex husband opened up to me on the phone.We are still married,but seperated.. He said he had been drinking and that he thinks our 2 year old daughter hates him, Besides the other females he got pregnant before we seperated he says "my son is the only child that doesnt hate me". My son always talks about his father all the time.When i tell him the news, he acts like he cant be bothered with what his kids are doing or saying,but wants to get mad when they ignore him?. When he comes to see our daughter which is (whenever he wants) she gives him the cold shoulder. She looks at him like she doesnt want him around or doesnt know him. He said that he was afraid of coming over because he was afraid of how our daughter reacts around him. I told him that he is "always absent" and she doesnt see him alot. I told him like i have been telling him since my daughter was born that he needed to make time for them, now that he is unemployed. I told him you must change. So he continued to say he knows, but when i asked him to come see the kids in the morning. He says that he needs to work on his car.Its always an excuse.. He is so backwards even when sober. I just continue to move on with my life. I asked if him he wanted to change his actions, before she and my son decide they dont want nothing to do with him? I say its his loss if he misses out...when it comes to my daughter, when she sees her father and she ignores him, how should i react? Should i not say anything when their dad feels like crap? What do you think?